Standard weird Wednesday morning. I drove Z to 0615 Pilates (!!!) and then somehow made it home. I haven’t figured out these Wednesday mornings lately, although on my unsteady return it was pleasant enough to do a slow breakfast and news. Then I was a bit lost, so I just did a fast Pascoe Vale return walk, knowing that exercise wasn’t going to happen today. But once back, I was dazed and confused, and so had to give in to mandatory nap for an hour. I hate them, but this was indeed necessary. And look! Now I’m up and doing stuff. Even this!
I keep wondering whether an equilibrium is coming. One in which I have this morning routine of a minimum of daily housework, followed by time in the office on whatever writing and web projects I have afoot. Then I go for a walk, maybe listen to either fun dross, or wise people as I walk, or just do the forest bathing thing if that beckons. Maybe volunteering in there somewhere. Then out to get dinner stuff, plus whatever other miscellaneous household things from bunnings and whoever. Then do the house things with those house purchases (garden, hanging pictures etc). More work in the office, then make dinner, await spouse’s return, and do whatever night things together.
And sure, all that does happen. But unpredictably. It rains (so no gardening) or I’ve slept badly (no deep reading, or programming) or the house needs more help (housework ramps up) or we have guests (all change!). That can be annoying if I’m taking pride in ticking things off, but I’m starting to think that laissez faire is a better thing for me right now. Sure, I know what needs doing (outside), and what is good for me (inside), but I have the incredible privilege of flexibility and I should celebrate that each day is different. That is true, even if I don’t reach the minimum I set myself.