When we moved to this house two years ago, the affable seller was immediately slotted (in my mind anyway) into the ‘capable and precise’ category. Well presented and organised, such souls are the sort that form the backbone of many workplaces. They know their universes back to front, have all the procedures defined and working, and they get solid performance appraisals year after year, Domestically, their domains within their houses are well ordered, maintained and understood. Projects are started and completed in a reasonable time scale. Whatever they do, they do it well. At least, the things they understand, they do well.

I myself lie further down that spectrum, the one spanning ultra capable and precise through to shambles embodied. The duchess and I would differ considerably on the exact placement. I do take some deluded pride in managing to complete some subset of projects in reasonable timescales, while still embracing the ill-defined randomness of the family chaos. When one of the longterm neighbours offhandedly noted that “geoff wouldn’t have let that couch infestation get out of hand like that”, I was only briefly sad. However I strongly suspect that the well organised and OCD pay a heavy price within a domestic setting. His wife had an air of exasperation over her, and communicated not at all subliminally (even to us strangers), that he was a handful. Whilst doubtless appreciative that the dishwasher filter was regularly cleaned and the garage tools well organised, one suspect she may have struggled more on the familial and emotional fronts.

I don’t look down on him, indeed I suspect such driven people move the world more than my more slapdash sort. But I like to think the rest of us have very real (if hidden) value to those around close to us, even if the dishwasher filter stays clogged for days.